The Cycle of Strength: Understanding Modern Masculinity

I started writing this essay on the morning of July 13th. In the evening of July 13th, there was an assassination attempt on Donald Trump.

No coincidence here.

There is a reason my Friday newsletter is called Friday Foursight. If I were a radio, my tune would be set to the station of God because I sense things when I’m individually with a person or within a larger group.

Not by my own doing. It is the gift of discernment by God.

I can say that as of this moment in time, there is a bigger momentum of courage and change building within the American mind and heart. If you don’t feel that, you may as well be deaf and blind.1

But since you are a reader of my Substack, I know you are smart. So, that above statement doesn’t apply to you.

All in all, God is doing a work at-large. His timing is also perfect.

So, I’m just here to observe and write about what I see and feel from my perspective.

A Moment in Time

Three months ago, on April 20th, my best friend’s dad passed away. It was an extremely sudden death. My best friend (Tom) is a warrior of a man though. He is a courageous, hard-nosed individual that will tell the truth when truth must be told.

Days later, at the funeral, Tom delivered a heartfelt speech in honor of his incredible dad. Following tributes from a close friend of his dad and his two sisters, Tom was the final speaker.

He started his speech with this quote:

His father lay in a casket, his family in the pews, and every friend and family member in attendance had their eyes on him. My best friend said this quote.

That is a strong man right there. Embracing his emotions, showing his emotions, yet remaining intact and unmovable by the power of God in his bones and veins.

Most men carry an unthinkable amount of weight on their shoulders they don’t tell anyone about. They still show up every day for other people with a good attitude and no complaints.2

This is one example of what it means to be an exemplary man.

Meekness, Not Weakness

Strength doesn’t mean having no emotions. Strength is embodying what you feel and reacting from a vantage point of service to God and to others.

We all feel the difficulties of this life in our ways, but the true warrior doesn’t crawl into a ball for cover.

The true warrior realizes there is more at stake, there are other people to protect, and true service is giving one’s life for another so that protection and safety are guaranteed.

Just this week, I had a moment when I wanted to lay on the couch and do nothing. It wasn’t rest. It was different than that. Just me and my thoughts about the adversity I experience.

It was after I did that, in which I realized how counter-productive it was.

As my favorite quote goes: “Action cures all.” So, I went forward with persistence in action — and I didn’t look back. Just as it always happens, everything worked out perfectly from there.

What happened to the deep patriotism that America once had? What happened to the will to die for another brother, no matter the cost? What happened to fighting back with truth and love, instead of slander and child-like mockery?

Well, all of that is still around, but it’s a dimmer of the blazing flame that it used to be. Time to claim it and bring it back with a roaring passion.

Jesus says it perfectly in Chapter 5 of the Book of Matthew.

What did Jesus mean when He said this?

The influence of the meek and self-controlled is in the long-run greater than that of the impulsive and passionate. Their serenity helps them to find the maximum of true joy in all conditions of life; for to them the earth is not a stage for self-assertion and the graspings of desire, but an “inheritance” which they have received from their Father.3

Meekness is a controlled strength that puts everything in the hands of God.

It’s founded on a deep trust in the Lord, and it always denies self.4

There is no need to grasp what is already destined to be inherited by you. Time simply needs to pass for it to be realized.

Bend, Don’t Break

The world will try to beat you to your knees. It will try and force you to submit and give in.

Don’t ever give in.

Endurance is the mark of man — and all bad fortune withers in the face of men who never give up.5

In the face of adversity, it is okay to bend, but do not break.

While the world and its pressures close in, smile and laugh. The opposition hates to see you calm, cool, and collected, while their attacks miss the mark.

Just like a tiger, dominance isn't always about being loud.

It's about being unapologetically you. Yet, if there are times that require being loud, so be it.

Let out that roar, then get back to work. But never quiet your roar for the comfort of sheep (others who are fearful).6

Using Proper Control

It’s like being a boxer that can knock out any person at any moment. Yet, having the self-control to resist doing so because such power is only meant to be used when it’s truly, truly needed.

Just because a boxer has the skills doesn’t mean it should be used whenever the boxer gets angry. Those abilities are meant for use in the boxing ring or for self-defense.

A time and place.

Use Your Power for Honor, Respect, and Responsibility

I was talking to a 43 year old woman the other day.

She said she is tired of being single and that she can’t find a strong man.

Maybe there is more to her self-induced-single-story. Maybe she is looking in the wrong places as well.

But one thing is for sure: the straw of the draw of strong men nowadays, for a woman, has significantly decreased.

I’ll give you facts to back my claim:

• Fatherless Homes

  • 1/4 children have no father in the U.S.

  • 80% of single-parent homes are led by single mothers

• Labor Force - Male Participation

  • 5.8% in 1976

  • 11.6% in 2010s

• Singleness

  • 63% of men under 30 describe themselves as single

• Unpartnered Adults

  • Rising to 39% in 2020s

Men: this is for us. Let's reclaim our strength, our courage, and our responsibility. Let's be the strong men that create good times. Let's use our power for honor, respect, and responsibility. The hard route isn’t easy, but it’s not meant to be. The world needs us now more than ever.7

God bless you,

Anthony

A BIG thank you to each of you reading this essay.

Thank you for adventuring with me as I develop through life.

1. Here is my website — you can find more stories, quotes, and deep dives here.

2. Each comment is helpful feedback for me to become a better writer and also connect with you more - let me know your thoughts on this piece

3. If you enjoyed — share with others ↓

(I would love to see you around the interweb → Twitter, Instagram, LinkedIn)